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#2
02-10-2009, 10:27 AM
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her last two posts were so sad. They were posted the day before she went missing. Last monday, she told her dad she was going hiking and was never heard from again. They found her body on Thursday in nature. Not What I Thought It Would Be I guess dreamswe build up in our minds are dangerous weapons for self-destruction. I had all of these scenarios planned out about how I would go home and come through the front door to surprise the dogs…..they would jump around and give me kisses and I’d get to see my cat. I’d chase Sandy around the backyard and gather up her toys and some of my old books. I’d try to fit my mountain bike into my car. That was the plan I had in my head. Mom had a different one. We ended up meeting at a park where we used to walk the dogs and I got Sandy back there. It’s strange to be unwelcome in the house you grew up in. It’s strange to have someone tell you that you can’t see your 22 year old cat or get your books and your old clothes. I can’t see the pictures of my family that we have sitting out near the entry way. I can’t get my writing or my old films off of the computer. Poor, poor pitiful me. That’s a really good Warren Zevon song. Also, I’m worried about how Sandy will adjust to the other animals here at the house. She’s been sitting on ‘my’ bed growling at anyone who walks by. I know how she feels. I’d like to have my own space somewhere in the world. I think that’s going to have to be nature, because I don’t have enough money to buy lunch let alone rent an apartment. I have to dig through my bag to find out the name of therapist and the time of our appointment tomorrow. I hope I wrote it down…. I really hope she found peace.
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