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#141
04-10-2015, 01:47 PM
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From Morty
 ============================================ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSoOFn3wQV4 Our favorite train wreck continues its assault on all that's good in the world.Yes.....NoAdvantage is still a fertile ground for those refused membership into Anonymous,yet have a visceral need for roller derby thrills.They can't have Motherfucl<ery,and so.....must accept Goddamitty. I predict NA will become the next i-net rebel army and call themselves UBIQUITOUS.They will wear clear plastic masks. =:> Special attention should be drawn upon the Triple Crown Room.No,those are not real posters in that drunk tank.....no,no,no,no,no,no. Those dream world characters have been brought to life by the writing wizardry of Freddy"Fender"Chaucer and Teddy Dostoevsky.It is unknown who the new JihadScientist might be,but it is not GetSmartMan. Then, and don't you dare miss a moment of this exciting action,there is the Interview with a Professional Gambler thread.This quite possibly is NA's most impressive blowhard thread of all time.It really defies science's long time axiom:Where there's smoke,there's fire. The interview itself I found quite amusing.Our pro gambler friend had is own business going very far south in its third year.So what happens? His WIFE says.....she says,''Oh honey.We're going belly up.You like gambling.Why don't you do it as a full time job?" Da WHAT!!?? Honest! That's what the guy said! The rest of it is pretty much a Dave Schwantz reality show.He feeds the gambler questions that the gambler always replies to with,"Oh absolutley." "Definitely." "Very much so Dave."....all to subtly show how sage the interviewer is;not the gambler.Of course Schwantz,further into the "interview",finds a way to make it about---who? HIM!! So fun! Oh yes, Dave let's us know how all his friends called him the best black jack player they ever saw....and , being a great horsey player....Dave Schwantz doesn't need a coach for that game.He IS a coach for that game. I went into the "meat" of the "interview" more than I would like, but did so to set up one of the comments made after the interview.It went something like this:"Gee Dave! Grade jub! You interview so well because(are you ready?)...you're such a good listener." I read that and my life quickly went by me. I taught I taw a puddy cat! Then I fell off Belky's chair!!!! HOLY MOTHER OF GOD!!!! Schwantz?....a good listener?? That's like saying Johnny Depp is modest! Oh my God, Racing Fans....there is no better way to feel good about one's self than to take in about 20 minutes of NA. In other news,Lauren Hill died this morning. She will make one realize ,one has a long way to go. CLYDEFORM!! pre race analysis of "The Run for the Rolaids"----The Arky Derby. But I would first like to make a commenty. This is a dreadful race held in a dreadful state. I am done commentying. 1....THE TRUTH IN GOOGLE Well what did you expect from a state that houses DaffyDanny? Dreadful. Crinkle.... trash can 2....MR. Z Lucas has announced to ML Baseball that Mr. Z is available Sunday for a one day contract and will pitch out of the bull pen for any team needing his services. Must be the Arkysas Swill. Crinkle.... trash can 3....BRIDGETTE'S ENORMOUS DUPA Oh my GOD!!!! NO! Crinkle.... trash can 4....MADEFROMLUCKY KEEPAH!! 5....COLD CON CARNE FEST ....uh oh.... Crinkle.... trash can 6....CANADIAN SPARROW Influenced by baffert. The poor horsey. Crinkle.... trash can 7....TAR FRIGHT Did you know Arkysas puts tar in the baby food sold in Arkysas stores? No wonder they're frightened. They need Miss "Competent Critical Reading Skills" to investigate. Crinkle.... trash can 8....Win The Space Sounds like a weird thing that would flop out of Tom Cruise's mouth,aye? If the Labyrinth of Scientology isn't HQ'd in Arkysas ,it should be. Crinkle.... trash can MADEFROMLUCKY to win. 
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#144
04-10-2015, 11:17 PM
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I don't like anyone in this race so I'm going to push the "All but Bridgette (how can she possibly run with an enormous dupa???)"button.
__________________
Hillary Clinton 2016: The "Extremely Careless" Leadership America Needs!
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#146
04-11-2015, 09:16 PM
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From Morty
============================================ Thank you for my trophy ,the awethome compliment and for not picking Bridgettes ENORMOUS Dupa. The current top 5 for the K-Derby are listed below as well as the Oaks top 5.It should be made known.....I do not use Form and The Ninth Configuration for any of my picks at any time. Also noted:I believe Stevie Hawking was wrong when he theorized...."Horserace handicapping is about the measurement and prediction of objects moving through space over a surface within a closed circuit." I think he was drinking too much and really meant: "Slinging human bodies from a catapult and betting on the outcome is about the measurement and prediction of objects moving through space over a surface* within a closed circuit." ( *....The surface here is the ground as skidding distance is calculated onto the hurling distance.) 1....International Star 2....Frosted 3....Materiality 4....Tencendur 5....War Story 6....Keen Ice 7....Horsey to be named later 8....Ditto 1....Eskenformoney 2....Luminance 3....ForeverUnbridled 4....ByTheMoon 5....Feathered 6....Silver Pockets Full 7....Purchasing 2 extra lives here
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#147
04-11-2015, 10:42 PM
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Sighty's Kentucky Fried Five Keepah-Keepah list:
1) Canadian Spaceship 2) Dortmund 3) Firing Line 4) Frosted 5) TBD (he's a very fast horsey!) Sighty's Kentucky Okie Dokie Keepah-Keepah list: 1) I'm a Chatterbox 2) Birdatthewire 3) Stellar Wind 4) Include Betty 5) Shook Up
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Tod Marks Photo - Daybreak over Oklahoma
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#148
04-11-2015, 11:08 PM
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Quote:
================================================== ==== !!OOOOOOOOOO!! BUT....butbutbutbut----When a Canadian Spaceship makes SUCCESSFUL landing( not a CRASH landing) on Nova Scotia,well then he might be a consideration.
__________________
Hillary Clinton 2016: The "Extremely Careless" Leadership America Needs!
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#149
04-15-2015, 05:18 PM
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From Morty
================================================== == Well. Looks like we got ahselfs a new playah heah. SIGHTYFORM!!----???? Anyhoo....it's time to revise the KFT5 by listing the KFB5: 1....Duodenum 2....Canadian Sparrow 3....OneUnluckyDane("unlucky" because he got stuck with baffert) 4....blechblechblech 5....Stanley 6....DaffyDannyMoon 7....The Carp 8....El Kaboom 9....Mudcabbage 10..UpSkirt "He gulped enormous amounts of liquid purple heroin in the hope of offsetting the torturous banging brought about by iodine isotope induced radiation.This is not exactly a high recommendation to the average lab rat as conclusive results are yet to be ascertained.But if ENORMOUS counts....it looks like they will be favorable." HUGE congratulations to Arletta and Deb-O-Deb. For different reasons neither of which I am allowed to divulge. This has nothing to do with ENORMOUS,by the by. Is NoAdvantage aptly named,or what? Could any forum have more posts about nothing? Would any forum allow Tits? I think Tuskalos has to be an elephant.There is no other explanation.Has Dave Schwontz claimed to have been Miguel Cabrera's little league baseball coach yet? HEY! Interview with a Professional Gambler II is on this week at NA! I can wait! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5tUHmHaa2Mg r u putzing around with the KD top four? Or just messing with who will win? Or maybe just the first 2 or 3? It's quite the abysmal mess,isn't it? Things might look so easy, but then you recall past KD's....and you should then think,"Oh my God.Why bother? Some horsey goes off like Palace Malice....and phwwwt! Or maybe no one used Rail Guard and Mine That Bird happens. Or a Point Given just doesn't feel like it today." It's all pretty nutty.But that's why you depend on CLYDEFORM!! Because CLYDEFORM!! will rescue you on those nutty race days.CLYDEFORM!! is also now proud to present ....baffertPROOFING!Yes, CLYDEFORM!! has taken into account those races where baffertness can well happen. Never again get stiffed by the biggest cheat this side of the IRS because YOUR CLYDEFORM!! is now baffertPROOF! Well now what do I do? I know that thanks to NA I am utterly used up in seeing terms like,"bank roll","klunk up","sample size"(God I hate this one!)....holy cow;I'm becoming addicted to taking pleasure in reading posts by the frozen,the dead and the stupid.Maybe that's why my subconscious has steered me to books about philosophy and physics.I hate philosophy and like physics but only in its elementary form.....like the apple hitting Newton's head.But ah have larnt the macro is really,really big and the micro is really,really small and philosophers don't care. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C5arxGd_GPQ I think someone on NT said the dwarf,Migliori,has been hot on UpSkirt to win the KD.This exemplifies why jockeys names are not found programmed into the smart phones of Mensa members.Those names are more likely to be found on the list of race track terrorists trigger words. "If you are reluctant about stepping on toes,you will never be able to squirt anyone with mustard." YOU SHOOK ME BABY!! SO BURY ME!!!! AMIGO'S!.....LET'S WENT!
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#150
04-16-2015, 02:34 PM
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Quote:
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#151
04-16-2015, 03:39 PM
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From Morty
================================================= Awethome question!! And yes....yes it does! You're familiar with this,I assume:"Horserace handicapping is about the measurement and prediction of objects moving through space over a surface within a closed circuit." Absolutely "drag" is factored in. It's sometimes referred to as "wind gravity." We also make use of E-MC squared.One can infer from this;a fat horse has the potential to run further and faster than a skinny horsey and CLYDEFORM!! makes that calculation easy for the dumb ass....whoa!....I mean intelligent horsey player.
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#152
04-16-2015, 08:48 PM
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I am off for the weekend but just wanted to say that the headline for Saturday's edition of CLYDEFORM should read " GO SHARED BELIEF"!!!!!!!!!!!!
__________________
Hillary Clinton 2016: The "Extremely Careless" Leadership America Needs!
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#156
04-17-2015, 04:23 PM
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From Morty
================================================== ===== The Updated Kentuky Fried Chicky Dinah!: 1....International Star 2....Frosted 3....Materiality 4....Tencendur 5....MadeFromLucky 6....Frammento 7....Keen Ice 8....Firing Line 9.... 10.. 11.. 12.. If you have been owned by JMess----your street cred is now all gone. Anyone have a site for the derby horses foal dates? This is very important. One of the most savage of all barbaric LZ tunes,it's blues based as is just about all music.You might want to check BLUES STORY A Documentary on u-tubey. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mln0RciE2o0 I don't have much to say today. But I never do. I shall now fucl< off. OFF I FUCl<!!!!
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#158
04-18-2015, 12:23 AM
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you guys are a bunch of weirdos.
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Linear Mode
