Current favorite Romney story

[Riot]

Mon May 07, 2012 at 12:00 PM EDT
by Kaili Joy Gray

'Anarchist Mitt Romney arrested in 1981 for 'disorderly conduct'

Laws are so for little people and suckers, aren't they? At least, according to this bit of dark anarchist history uncovered by Andrew Kaczynski at Buzzfeed, which shows there was a lot more than some innocent strapping-the-dog-to-the-roof-of-the-car shenanigans on those infamous Romney family vacations:

According to what Romney told the Boston Globe in 1994, he had taken his family off to Wayland, Mass.'s Lake Cochituate, about an hour outside Boston, for a summer excursion. As Romney prepared to put his family boat into the water, a park officer told Romney not to launch because his license appeared to have been painted over. The officer told Romney if he put his boat into the water he would face a $50 fine.

Romney felt that his license was still visible and decided to ignore the order from the officer and pay the fine.

"I figured I was at the state park with my kids. My five kids were in the car wondering why we weren't going out in the boat, so I said I'd launch and pay the fine,” Romney said in 1994.

Note to Occupy Wall Street protesters who've been beaten and pepper sprayed: next time, try invoking the "But I'm with my kids, for Pete's sake!" loophole. That should totally work.

Apparently, the police officer didn't much care for Mitt's "Screw you, copper" attitude and arrested poor Mitt for being a rich, smug ******* "disorderly conduct."

"He did not have the right to arrest me because I was not a disorderly person. This was an obvious case of false arrest," Romney said.

Oh, well, in that case. Again, note to protestors: next time you're about to be arrested, just let the cop know he doesn't have the right to arrest you because you're not that kind of person.

You may well find yourself arrested anyway, but as long as you're willing to pay the fines—oh, and toss around some threats of litigation—you should be out of there in no time, your records sealed, free to go along your merry way.

At least, that's how it works for Mitt Romney, man of the people, who is quite clear that laws don't really apply to the rich, who can afford to just pay their way around them.

As for the rest of you thugs, you 99 percenters who don't agree with the law and can't afford to shrug it off and pay the fines and threaten lawsuits and have your records sealed and still go on to become governor and presidential wannabe?

Well, as Mitt Romney would say, "America's right, and you're wrong."