Songs!
 

Does this ever happen to anyone else too? You are at the races and the gates open and the horses fly out and all of a sudden you get a song stuck in your head and have to stop looking so you can fumble through your purse past the mints and the brush and oh there's my Clinique lipstick and which quarter is that - is that the newest one cause if it is i better put it away so I can add it to my collection - and finally you find a pen but there's nothing to write the words on and the race is over? That happens to me all the time!

So who else here changes the words to a song when a race is being run? Like during the Belmont I kept singing

Are you sleeping?
Are you sleeping?
Bob and John.
Bob and John.
Platinum Couple's coming
Platinum Couples coming
Oh my God
Oh my God.

Or that Wake Me Up When September Ends song?

Deputy Glitters is
such a dumb name
who ever played him
is insane
wake me up when Bluegrass Cat wins.

He beat you once but
it was just luck
and when it happened
i yelled Oh ****
wake me up when Bluegrass Cat wins.

Here comes Jazil again
What's up with that mane?
I took a picture but the man in front
got his head in the frame.

Well I can't remember the rest but the good news is I found that lipstick i was looking for!!! So who else does this or am I the only one??? I hope I'm not the only one or I'd feel like a real oddball!!!!! My therapist says I'm not by the way but I don't like him cause he always stares at my chest!!! I think he has issues but that can be another thread altogether!!!

Let's all sing!!!!!

WOW AND I THOUGHT I HAD PROBLEMS...LOL

JUST KIDDING:D :p

What makes you think i have problems????? I am NORMAL but i like to sing is all. Don't you like to sing too??? Let's sing!!!

Hey, I had that same song going through my head during the Belmont. This is freaking me out!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I really think we have ESPN. :)

Another great topic by the way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And I'll sing with ya. ;)

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...

besides being a hot item of tail, you are also clever.


i am not much good at this but let me try anyway. you are my muse of inspiration, you hot thang.

"Fever"
never knew my miss storm cat
never knew how much i cared
when you dropped those lyrics on me
gave me fever that's so hard to bear

fever! when you kiss me
fever when you do it slow

fever! in barn 37
fever all thru the shedrow


P.S. hunney i'll complete your quarter collection, you can get anything you want from me.

You people are so sick. :p

I'm so happy that I need another tranqualizer!!!!! Hooray!!!!!

You are kind!!!!! I don't understand the Barn 37 part though so I'm getting anxious now. Maybe another pill!!!!!

Thanks!!! Sickness leads to recovery or something like that!!!!!

There simply aren't enough smilies to properly convey my emotions at the moment....

Just hang out with me sometime i will explain the whole barn 37 story to you in a way that you can understand.


You seem to be a perky chick and i think that is cute, definitely my type OK? So what do you say. (We can meet at the track first if your more comfortable)

You know I read the lyrics again and now i think it will be stuck in my head all day long!!!!!

Aren't you busy with the girl whose name i can't remember right now because i am busy thinking about trains and Fever and the Betty Ford Clinic and my new friend who shares ESPN?????

I am very flattered!!! You are kind and a real class gentleman!!!!!

Maybe you could write the story in a song!!!!!

Dude that was great. Can I borrow it? There's a chick I'm trying to impress but the only talent I gots is in the bedroom.

This will take a while but i'll be back.

Well sir that's the right place to start. And yeah go ahead and use it if it helps.


From there we have what i refer to as the "trickle down effect" (remember regan-omics? lol) whereby if you dazzle her in the bedroom department you can treat her proportionately crappier in all other areas. This means you can expect her to pick up the check for dinner 90% of the time and pretty much not call her unless you feel like it, then she calls you and most of the time it is for a piece of azz because that is all she can think about. Doesn't that sound good to you?

I hear you man and that's a good style but this chick seems different. Let's take it one step at a time and try to get the train in the tunnel before we plot out the future. Do you hear me?

How is the song writing going????? Are you almost done??? I can't wait to hear it!!!!! I see you added Choo Choo to your sig!!!!! Do you think the others know you are talking about a penis????? Should I not have said that????? Me and my big mouth!!!!! Oh well at least it's good for some things!!!!!

Oh, so the train is basically still careening down the mountain, seeking, searching, straining, to find the tunnel still... is that what your saying?


OK well see me for advice after. Unless you still need help getting in the tunnel because i am also good for recommending ways to get into especially tight tunnels although i guess that is all relative to the size of your train lol.

Oh f, i left my preliminary draft somewhere that I was writing earlier.

I need to step out for a while (very important business to attend to you see) but i will pick it up on my way home and bang it out. LOL. You know what i mean.

I think I know what you mean but of course i cannot be sure. Anyways I thought it was time to snap myself out of my latest depression and so I have been busy as a beaver. I had to try to think of something that makes me happy because what with Rocky retired and all. Anyways i was thinking of all you fine men and Christmas! In June!!! Here is what i thought of and since i don't know what kinds of music you all like i wrote them in the music of Christmas songs!!!

This one is for Flo- it's in the tune of Silver Bells.

You're so sassy
hot and classy
and your penis is big
It would make a real good
Christmas present.

Betty Ford Guy
and lastkidpicked
and you, what do i do?
Want you all but this
one songs for you.

Flowing Tail
Flowing Tail
someday you'll get laid, stay sane!
Meds kick in,
lets begin
Look at the size of that train!!!

This one is for Bettyfordclinic, in the tune of Here Comes Santa Clause-

Goodbye Betty Ford!
Goodbye Betty Ford!
We'll be back someday!
BF guy, he and me
you know we can't keep away!

Drinking, smoking,
popping pills and
passing out in the rain!
We'll return
but for now I'll yearn
for his Betty Ford train!

They all have a similar theme! Here's one for Lastkidpicked-
It's sung in the tune of The First Noel-

The Laaaaaaast kid
who was picked in gym class,
he's a sweeeeet guy
does he do it slow or fast?

Oh laaaaast kid
all your fears will be solved
If no one picks you I will
if no midgets are involved!

Last Kid, last Kid
picked in gym class,
we can do it how you want
just not up my azz.

Now I will wait for your song!!! Ho Ho Ho!!!!!

MMSC, this ought to explain most of the story for you.


"Bridge on troubled sloppy-track"

when dix is weary
feeling old
when tears are in his steel blue eyes
Bold will dry them away

he's on your side
ohhhhhhhhh when tracks get cuppy
when bobby just cant! be! found!

like a barn on the sloppy track
dix will lay it down
like a thrown shoe on the backside
dix will ride coaltown!

when he's down and out
boxes on his feet
when evening falls so hard
call on Latent Heat

he'll take your hand
oh! when darkness comes
and pain is all around
like for-tyyy thousand silver horseshoes
he will lay them down
like citation's stable ponyyyy
hears the anthem every sound

sail on boy wonder
sail on by
your time has come to shine
all your dreams are on their way.

see how steel blue shines!
ohhh when you need an imaginary friend
buddy's sailing right behind

like a catlike movement on the new yacht!
MORONS ease your mind
like a chiseled feature on a young BROAD
dixie's tough to find

Double D, stop and ask for directions. This thread is for

singing songs written by white guys with fros
christmas songs turned bad
asking Flowing T for advice

I think u want aisle 4.

Awwe thanks for the great lyrics these are really something and i enjoyed your totally correct description of me.

Anyways this got me to thinking about Christmas in June too what a neat idea. Then I came up with another song see how it goes, this one isn't a love song but in a way I guess it kind of is, to Dixie anyway.

OK so here goes dont make fun:



THE TWELVE MONTHS OF DERBY

"On the twelfth month before Derby, my true Dix gave to me...

12 - T.C. prospects!

11 - Broken maidens

10 - Triple digit Beyers

9 - Stalls at Saratoga

8 - Tender bucked shins

7 - Milk shake suspensions

6 - Hyperbaric O2's

5 - Golllllllllden pedigrees!

4 - Lasix shots

3 - Stem cells

2 - Left to race

And a Rockport in a bar shoe!"

Look Davona Dale...I know you are new on this board, and you should probably avoid threads like these. The knowledgeable people and posts are in the Paddock threads. You will learn a lot from the Paddock, and most everyone is willing to explain something to someone. If you ever have any questions, please feel free to private message me and ask. If I don't know the answer, I will point you to someone who does.:D

Flo do you know the Godolphin motto? it's all I can say is wow and believe you me that's what i thought of when i read your very good songs! you are doing a good job in trying to woo me but even though you're a manly man and all I'm afraid my heart belongs to another. I would see him at the Clinic at meds time and think oh god please let him talk to me and he did which is good since he ignored me when i asked for a pony when i was ten and world peace and stuff. I don't know what he was talking about but that's not the point at all is it? And so now that I have found him and even though i am swept away by your song writing expertise I have to stay loyal. Of course maybe not because I can't predict the future like Rocky probably can!!!!! Thank you though. Do you know the song Oh Yoko? John wrote it.

In the middle of a thread
in the middle of a thread I see
you name
Yo! Flow Jo
Yo! Flow Jo
You really do turn me on.

Now I have to say one other thing and that is this- I really do think you should listen to Rock Hard and use the name Flowing T because it's quite manly and I can imagine you driving around in one of those big Cadallic things with the pretty rims that go round and round and if you stare at them for too long you feel a little high. Flo is nice but it's a little girly and I know you're not so maybe i will now call you Flowing T!!!

Thanks for the story of Dixie too!!!!!

Rock Hard,
I got your email and no I can't think of what will rhyme with Chupster either except for Soup Sir or Bloop Fur and I don't think that will impress her. i did think of the song Feelings and maybe you could write something like

Chupster
Nothing rhymes with Chupster
I'm feeling so blue were
you thinking of me too.

Please note that i am not singing that to Chupster but only trying to be a friend because he's my friend and he knows my secrets like who I'm hot for and stuff but he better shut up or there will be trouble and I'll tell everyone who he slept with and won't you all be surprised and no it wasn't me!!!!!

Well once again I had a moment!!!!! I wrote out a whole Morrisey song but i didn't log in and now it's gone because i can't keep too much in my head at once even though that's probably very surprising to you all so here's what i think- since Rock hard Ten Fan and Chupster don't seem to talk to each other even though I think they should in my humble opinion I will attempt to bring them together!!!!! What song does everyone know????? Okay I got one! It'a a horrible song that I bet you Paul really wrote and John and George ran out of the recording studio screaming when it came time to record it!!!!! At least it is one they both probably know so let me put on my thinking crown and write it!!! it's in the tune to Oh Bla Dee oh Bla Die or however you would spell it!!!!!

Rock Hard Ten likes Chupster
but there is no rhyme
I think he should just call her Chupie!
They're both cute and this way
he could let her know
she has a special internet groupie!

Rock Hard Ten
wants to get
up your skirt, oh!
Flowing T
taught him to flirt!
(repeat)

Chupie loves her kittens and
Rock Hard loves his,
one is named Jamaica and she's black.
He plays tennis, found words to
O Canada,
and for that i had to
go give him a smack!

(chorus)

They're a couple of kids
who will make
each other
loopy!

They're a couple of kids
running on the track,
Rock Hard Ten Fan
and Chupie!

Sorry for this song but I'm
out of my meds
it's helping my newest
stress attack.
Anyway i wish you well
i got to go
and find some vicodin or speed
just nooooo crack.

Yeah!

Rock Hard Ten!
Wants to get!
up your skirt, oh!
Flowing T
taught him to flirt!

Rock Hard Ten
wants to get
up your skirt, oh!
Flowing T taught him to flirt
So if you guys need help
just go ask Flowing T!

Hey, you sound like a hardworking girl who's got her stuff together, especially at 20-wow-at 20 I was much too kookoo to do what you do . Hey, that sounds like a Cole Porter song . Too kookoo to do what you do. I did what you do, that you do so well . Anyway, stick around . Don't let anyone put a thorn in your bush .

Your welcome . But like I said, don't let anyone put a thorn in your bush . Check out this Pedigree Ann poster . She knows her stuff and is not afraid to cut to the chase . A serious and knowledgable sister . My father would have whupped my azz if I had been rude, but I sometimes walk a fine line . Now I have a dumb song in my head . Speed Boys, Speed Boys, whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do when they come for you . Where did that come from ?

Well I think that i have to say that i am in awe of you and very very impressed!!!!! That is a great song and thank you because now like you that will be stuck inside my head all day long too and what with all the other information in there i think it might explode!!! i hope you will do us all the service of finishing your fine fine song!!!!!

I think you need a real man who will do you right and that is me, i mean if my song is wowing you already than i am better than some dummy who isn't giving you the attention a lady needs do you read me?

Yes i should use the name Flowing T that is manly you are right. THis is just for explaining to newbies that the TAIL flows my way so i have to leave it for official purposes. But you call me Flowing T baby, how does that sound?

Hi there Choo Choo! Well first of all I have to make it clear that i said you are wooing me but yes you are wowing me too!!!!! I am quite the happy camper now that you see what I mean about the name because the last thing i would want is for you to think I don't think you are manly. You are a manly man!!!!! Anyway the word Flo reminds me of my period and i was thinking what would it be like to be in bed with you yelling Flo!!!!! Flo!!! And how exactly would i not think of a tampon!!!!!

I think I would start laughing and that wouldn't be very good, would it? I only laughed once in bed with a certain someone and let me tell you if that thing was nine inches than he must have thought the ceilings were thirty feet high!!!!! You are manly, kind and understanding Flowing T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!

Choo Choo!!!!! I am requesting a boarding pass since I have now been abandoned and am very sad but you cheered me up well you and my Rockport harbor doll and pictures did!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

I love trains! There's just something about big long hot steamy things. Chuga chuga choo choo baby :D Makes me wanna jump on and ride!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LOL well we could not have you thinking about your womanly issue b/c then you would not enjoy it, you know? But like any good jock i know how to give a well timed ride on a sloppy track, if you hear what i am saying.

But anyways you would not be laughing with me and you certainly wouldn't be thinking 'he must say the ceilings are 30 feet high.' No ma'am i do believe you would be in shock similar to a person who just sat down on a traffic cone.

All aboard and i promise to help you cheer up if the rocky pics are getting boring yet. I said if.

Well now for someone who is even newer than me you sure like to discuss things like cucumbers and trains!!!!! Please tell me you are a Rocy fan too!!!!! Why don't you write a song about things that are long that some people like to put in their mouths (me!!! me!!!) and other places (me!!! me!!!)????? is Happy T for Happy Tocket or is it because you like Tea but can't spell it or is it a code word because you like pretending to be a spy or some such thing????? I once had a dream that Rocky was a spy!!!!!

Here is a line from it-

Harbor. Rockport Harbor.

Did you like it????? He was so suave!!!!! Not the horse Suave though!!!!! I can't wait to hear your song!!!!!

I board 2 at a time on my train if you are a chick lol.

Well it is a big releif that you said if or i would question if this could ever have a chance of working even if it is only for a night of cheap sex!!!!! So why don't you tell me how high the ceilings are big boy????? you can do it in song format if you want!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!11

Choo Choo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Do you TTimes outcasts have any idea how absolutely stupid you sound?
I'm not trying to be mean but most of us have a life, and don't have to resort to te inet to get laid or talk about sex. You are real pathetic folks.

Is this the kinda song you're talking about MMStorm Cat???

Ride baby ride
Ride baby ride

On a slow train
to no where
Through the
deep tunnel
to that special
place, ooooh

Ride baby ride
Ride baby ride

Flowing Tail,

I don't like to share, just so you know :p

Very nicely done!

Well now do you need a nap or something because it seems to me that someone is being a little cranky!!!!! I've got it!!!!! you need your very own song!!!!! hooray!!!!!

Here, this is just for you. Do you like Christmas songs? Good!!!!! It's in the tune of Jingle Bells!!!!!

Or-a-cle, Or-a-cle
we're being allegorical!
Do you like to ride in boats?
You should buy a coracle!

Or-a-cle, Or-i-cle,
I remember when
I talked to you long ago,
was that on ESPN?

Bold well he's a nut,
Dixie is a bettor,
Maybe you can try
sex and use a fetter!

That's a shackle for
ankles and feet
If you wear flip flops
there's been some
debate - do they look neat? Oh...

Or-a-cle, Or-a-cle
chill and go try zen
or you'll end up sour like
those two bitter old men!

Merry Christmas Grumpy.