No. I don't know of any 18 handicap that can chip or putt with any consistency. If they could, they wouldn't be 18 handicaps. New equipment alone isn't gonna drop their handicap.

I do and I was a much better golfer in '97 than I am now. Strictly because of the ball, I played the Titleist Professional back then versus the Pro V1 or Maxfli Revolution now, it's simply a better ball.

Tiger sent me a Christmas card today.

8, 10, 7, 6, 4
1, 2, 5, 9
3

You're better than me. Sans Tiger, they all look like 1's:{>: :{>:

Leno has been rolling out some pretty funny Tiger jokes tonight. :D

I guess why you are dying of dehydration, everything looks like an oasis.

:eek:

:D
:tro:

What is the difference between Santa and Tiger?

































Santa stops at 3 "Hos"

Little Johnny Getting in the Act
 

Even Little Johnny is getting in on this.


It is near the Christmas break of the school year. The students have turned in all their work and there is really nothing more to do. All the
children are restless and the teacher decides to have an early dismissal.

Teacher: "Whoever answers the questions I ask, first and correctly can leave early today."

Little Johnny says to himself "Good, I want to get outta here. I'm smart and will answer the question."

Teacher: "Who said 'Four Score and Seven Years Ago'?"

Before Johnny can open his mouth, Susie says, "Abraham Lincoln."

Teacher: "That's right Susie, you can go home."

Johnny is mad that Susie answered the question first.

Teacher: "Who said 'I Have a Dream'?"

Before Johnny can open his mouth, Mary says, "Martin Luther King."

Teacher: "That's right Mary, you can go."

Johnny is even madder than before.

Teacher: "Who said 'Ask not, what your country can do for you'?"

Before Johnny can open his mouth, Nancy says, "John F. Kennedy."

Teacher: "That's right Nancy, you may also leave."

Johnny is boiling mad that he has not been able to answer to any of the questions.

When the teacher turns her back Johnny says, "I wish these bitches would keep their mouths shut!"

The teacher turns around: "NOW WHO SAID THAT?"

Johnny: "TIGER WOODS. CAN I GO NOW?"

Wow, someone from Indiana is of some use after all.

Surprised you hadn't heard that one before today. That is an old joke that was going around back in the Rodney King/Mark Furhman sh*t back in LA.

I've probably already heard it, but it's better with Tiger in it. He had already told one of them that she talks too much. It's not foul enough though. Tiger would say "I wish these bitches would shut the fk up." I think he's been saying it each day (about women, the media, people from Sweden etc.) He should be playing golf as soon as possible. This other stuff can't be fixed. All he has left is golf, and money. To be honest, they're probably the only permanent things he needs. I got to give credit to Gales for estimating his number of affairs at 12. I said 5, but Tiger Woodpecker went right on by my number. He's been so damn bold.

i was wrong to it was higher

Padraig on Tiger - :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6KnJkJe_d4c

He's the best. . .

That was funny.:D

AT&T gives him a nice belated birthday present. Dropped him like a bad habit.

Details on Tiger
 

that's a helluva tale if it's true!

Okay......Tiger's problems and how he chooses to address them with his family are his business, but why aren't the police taking a harder line with the 9 Iron to the head or assault with a deadly weapon.....he's a schmuck but she could have easily killed him with very little effort. No doubt the courts would look at a nine iron as a deadly weapon.

Physical abuse is worse in my opinion. What Tiger did was wrong, but if Elin smacked him with a golf club, that isn't exactly right either. They really should just divorce.

If? She did. Knocked a couple of his teeth out. He's lucky that's all she did.

........a woman scorned!

Somehow it's nice to tell a story through pictures.......

http://deadspin.com/5416369/

had she walked in on him in the act, and killed him and the lover-she'd most likely get off due to it being called a crime of passion. hitting him with a golf club is serious-but i think his having sex with god knows who and potentially exposing his wife to myriad std's is worse than getting hit in the face. then there's destroying his family-his contempt for his wife and children is the worst behavior possible.

thank you

you're welcome. i can understand someone having an issue with a wife assaulting her husband-but weren't his repeated sex acts with virtual strangers essentially a series of assaults on his wife? it amazes me that there is far more condemnation of her behavior that night then on his over a few years' time. he's a pig. any claims that a man can't help himself are belied by the number of men who do control themselves, and who show lifelong commitment to their spouse.

A "crime of passion" is not a justifiable legal defense. A person can't get off based on that. The only way they could get off in a case like that would be if they claimed "not guilty by reason of temporary insanity" and that defense rarely works nowadays.

I don't think I've seen a single case in the last 20 years of a person getting off who killed their spouse and their spouse's lover.

Well said.

So if she were the one sleeping around being a pig, it's then ok for him to take a driver to her skull?? Really? No, the proper response for his actions are to divorce him and take a truck load of his money if she chooses....not physical violence. In reality there hasn't been any condemnation whatsoever of her actions, as there is really no proof whatsoever of what happened anyway. If she assaulted him with a golf club, it's not good behavior. It's the pretty simple case of correcting a wrong with another wrong is pretty much well...wrong.

One of Tiger's skanks released his txt messages. Awful. Screwed up dude.

Tiger:Sent: 04:06 PM 08/28/2009:
I want to be deep inside you

Tiger:Sent: 03:36 PM 08/29/2009:
After i cum you better start sucking my cock to get it hard

Tiger:Sent: 04:02 PM 08/29/2009:
I want to treat you rough. Throw you around, spank and slap you

Tiger:Sent: 04:06 PM 08/29/2009:
Slap your face. Treat you like a dirty little whore. Put my cock in your ass and then shove it down your throat

Tiger:Sent: 04:07 PM 08/29/2009:
You are my ****ing whore

Tiger:Sent: 04:08 PM 08/29/2009:
Hold you down while i choke you and **** that ass that i own

Tiger:Sent: 04:10 PM 08/29/2009:
Then im going to tell you to shut the **** up while i slap your face and pull your hair for making noise

Tiger:Sent: 04:21 PM 08/29/2009:
Where do you want to be bitten

Tiger:Sent: 5:00 PM 08/29/2009:
I really do want to be rough with you. Slap you around

Tiger:Sent: 05:12 PM 08/29/2009:
For years. And punish you for not seeing me more

Tiger:Sent: 05:15 PM 08/29/2009:
I want you to beg for my cock. Kiss you all over to convince me to let you have it in your mouth

Tiger:Sent: 05:26 PM 08/29/2009:
Next time i see you, you better beg and if you don't do it right i will slap, spank, bite and **** you till mercy

I'm thinking he needs more therapy than 6 weeks...Maybe no Masters for you Tiger.

Mr. Dominatrix :eek:

The 2nd one is pretty odd. I thought people snacked during intermission. He just goes right to the 2nd act. Freak doesn't even reload.

How this wife stays with him is beyond me? I get it, I understand money, but c'mon.

"Pull your hair for making noise"- This is getting a lil too close to fantasizing rape. To be honest, these messages are meant to be read by the people involved. They craft them for the other person's likes n' dislikes. They really aren't a great way to judge a person's true views on something. If anything needs context it's those messages. For all we know, she requested he talk that way.

He's a textaholic.

Disturbing indeed.

Mind you he is texting this stuff to a porn star, not exactly the type who will keep it hush hush. Dude is flat out dumb.